January 10th, 2003

zombie penguin


in the meantime

"I am somehow less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein's brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops." -- Stephen Jay Gould

this lady came into cumbys tonite and used her debit card to buy some milk or something. as standard practice at this store, i asked her to sign 1 copy of her receipt, for our records or whtaever the hell we use them for. officially, we don't NEED signatures for debit, only credit, but we are supposed to ask. if they refuse, so be it. sometimes people will get all huffy that well i've never needed to sign for it BEFORE! (people like to say how things hvae always been different the 4823583 other times theyve been in the store cuz theyre a loyal customer and how it was never like this before. they are always lying. not just about this, about all sorts of things. you could never prepay for gas on a credit card here, i dont care what you say. the computers are not designed to allow it. no you did not do it just last week. youre either lying or deluded.) but anyway, this lady says she's never had to sign for debit before. she didnt say she never had to THERE before, so i didnt instantly discount her as insane or stupid, she just said she's neverhad to before. a lot of places dont ask for it. i tell her it's policy there to ask for a signature. it's also policy that if she didnt want to, rather than get in a big shouting match with her, she doesnt have to. but instead of saying she didnt want to sign, she says to cancel the transaction and she'll pay with cash. why is she so adamant about this? now, seeing as i already had a receipt for her to sign copies of, the debit charge had gone thru. because cumberland farms' computer system is DESIGNED BY BLEEDING MORONS, doing a refund on a card (which i didnt even know we could do until a few days ago) ties up the credit system for like 15 minutes. it's a blast. especially becuase it's screwy in the 1st place and i had to reboot the systemm once already tonite by that point.
an aside- with credit cards, supposedly a signature is required, because that's the only proof we have that you are who you claim to be and are supposed to be using the card (of course, there is nothign to sign when you charge gas to your card at the pumps). we are suposed to compare signatures on the back of the card to the receipt. this causes problems, such as many people not bothering to sign their cards in hte 1st place, and the fact that if i dont think it matches (like i'm qualified to judge signatures) the charge has already gone thru. all i know about the person at that point is that theyre someone who steals credit cards. "excuse me mister criminal, please wait while i cancel that charge and keep the card. also, please give back all the things you just bought. no, i'd rather not be shot in the face tonight, thanks for asking though". i usually dont check at all. as chris pointed out to me long ago: if you stole a credit card, the first place you would go is NOT cumberland farms.
so anyway, the crazy old lady didnt want to sign anything. fine, she dint have to, it was debit. i told her she was all set. rather than leave, she stood there for 5 minutes fidgiting with her stuff and her purse for no discernable reason. she didnt want anything, or any help. she was all set. okay. eventually since she was standing right there, i asked her why she refused so strongly to sign for her debit. i understood that (as she said yet again) she'd never had to do it before, and that since she had the PIN it was fairly pointless. but why did she outright refuse to do so to the extent of prefering to cancel the whole transaction? because, she said with an enigmatic smile, she didnt like to leave her signature in more places than she needed to. what? is she james bond? is a secret clan of master forgers hot on the trail of her signature? i have never seen such a clear case of what appeared to be a stolen card as this crazy lady. why else make such a stink about it? other than general futsiness about needing to do anything she doesnt absolutely have to on-pain-of-death do, i cant think of any good reason why she would act like this if the card isnt stolen. on the other hand, she's an old lady and she was buying something like a loaf of bread and some milk. if it is stolen, that is the shittiest heist ever. SWEET, ILL-GOTTEN MILK! NO MORE HONEST LABOR FOR ME! i don't even know.
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