April 21st, 2003


you can tell i have a lot to do when i start posting to lj every 20 minutes

do i have a smell? i don't know if i dont or if i'm just used to it. cuz no matter how often i wear something it doesnt smell - except my socks, cuz i have sweatygross feet. but the rest of my clothes never smell even tho i've been wearing the same like 3 shirts for 2 weeks now, so i hope that's really true and not just me not noticing

i am getting upset with myself. i have this paper to do that was due 2 weeks ago and i just can't get it done. i have it half-written (not even very well) which i did the night before it was 1st due. every time i sit down to finish it i go blank. i just have no idea what to say. i'm sure i COULD do it but every time i try i freak out that i dont know what to do instead
  • Current Music
    wunh is being eaten by a boa constrictor

(no subject)

we dehumanize people when we think of them as being in groups. sometimes it's neccesary to do so, you can't very well deal personally with every person in the world, but it is still a sad fact that you will deal with them differently as part of such and such community of persons than if you think of them as an individual whom* you might take out to lunch. or maybe you wouldnt, i dont presume to tell you your limits, but most of us would and do.

* who or whom? i can't remember. i always tell the difference because i know that the standard stereotype butler line "whom shall i say is calling?" is incorrect. but now i can't figure out how to read the sentence: is whom there the subject or object? is "I shall say who is calling?" a transformation or merely a similar sentence? okay nevermind that. i had a grammar crisis but i solved it.
  • Current Music
    Suggestions - - - Remains of a Heart
alien chest burst


yeah today is super. so i couldnt get any work done last night, i couldnt get to sleep last night, i woke up today with drymouth, i got up an hour earlier than need be becuase alex has different office hours than are listed on the english dept site and didnt bother coming in this morning even though it's class sign-up day adn he really should be around, so i went and got some food and felt nausous after half a bagel, and lenny hasnt answered my voicemail so i still have to go to the fencing demo thing i signed up for like 2 weeks ago which means i cant come see alex when it IS his office hours OR talk to my 18th century lit teacher about the late fucking paper AND i have a bunch of other stuff to do today. at least my appt in hall house went okay. and i havent been hit by a bus yet today. those are the 2 good things.
  • Current Music

he went fuckily along

okay i hate life less now. talked to my lit teacher for a sec and she said make an appt to talk to her and we'd figure things out. which is better than hey the paper is late go die. i was not expecting her to be evil, as she seems nice enough a person, but it's still good to know officially i'm not fucked. and alex decided to show up early after all and i caught him essentially by blind luck, so i'm in for advanced fiction, which means not taking grammar, which is more reason to hop on the ling analysis bandwagon, especially as i'm considering taking logic over the summer. i didnt have time to talk to alex about the thesis thing cuz i had to go to class but he seemed cool with it. i'll chat him up tomorrow
i had most of a muffin an hour ago and didnt get nausious, so that passed. at least for teh time being, i dunno. and the fencing demo was lotsa fun - which i was expecting, i wanted out of it for more worktime - we were out at a ymca daycamp thing, showing them all what it's about. them all being a bunch of kindergarden thru 5th graders. they were suitably impressed, even though all our equipment malfunctioned. they wanted our autographs! i'm an international fencing superstar.
okay, this superstar has a fiction story to write.
  • Current Music
    Suggestions - - - Sucker