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February 19th, 2003

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05:23 am - where oh where
wedding plans....
stgegodess (11:18:10 PM): basically, I say "hey lets do it like this!" and he says "okay!" because he wants as little to do with planning as possible. if it was up to him, we would get married in a 2 minute ceremony, eat lots of sweets and possibly red meat, kick everyone out after a half hour then have sex for 3 years. nonstop.
King Nixon (11:20:18 PM): that sounds essentially like my ideal wedding. but specifically ice cream for sweets, and 2 minutes sounds a bit excessive

oh yes. so training at wunh today.. 1st i was with jim hiccox. or possibly a different last name. but jim awesomest guy ever. he was the best. and then at 3 brian guy took over. i was set to leave at 4, so at like 3:30 he tells me that i'm in charge til i leave, and he wanders off. i'm like 8-o cuz i dont have anything to play or anything. i think i woulda been fine if i'd had some stuff picked out, but i ended up running around during each song looking for one to follow it with. all in all, i think i did quite well though. i only screwed up once, when i turned on the turntable instead of the minidisc and didnt know why the station ID wasnt playing.. hmm. but yeah, i had good stuff on. grandaddy, earth crisis, magnetic fields, pansy division, gwenmars, jack drag, gadjits [i told him play track 15, he put on track 10, it was full of swears. ha]. woo! also, with jim, when i was going on for a talkback i hit myself in teh face with teh headphones putting them on, because i am smooth, and then i went on and said that i had just hit myself with the microphone. then i gave up on life. i think i gave myself brain damage

i dont think the problem is i'm in a situation i cant control. the problem is i'm in a situation i'm not equipped to understand.

i saw punch drunk love sunday. it was an excellent movie, but it bothered me. i found i could relate to barry a lot, like uncomfortably so. minus the lashing out (and phillip seymour hoffman threatening to kill him, etc).. the repression and smiling silent seeth.. sometimes when i'm really frustrated, eithr with myself or someone/thing else, i'll have the urge to go into a rage like he did, but i never do. i dont know if that makes me healthier than him or less so
state: everywhere
np: J Mascis + The Fog - More Light - - Where'd you go

(4 shots upside the head | en garde!)


[User Picture]
Date:February 22nd, 2003 07:26 pm (UTC)
less so.
[User Picture]
Date:February 23rd, 2003 12:25 am (UTC)
*destroys you in his mad rage*
[User Picture]
Date:February 23rd, 2003 05:12 pm (UTC)
it's not good to keep things bottled up. sometimes you need to just fly off the handle and get wicked pissed off and kick and scream and cuss and be childish with your anger. if you don't you might seriously explode or give yourself an ulcer.
[User Picture]
Date:March 2nd, 2003 02:43 pm (UTC)
i know.. but i cant release myself that much. i cant cry either

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