there's a muscle that starts either in your lower back or upper ass, i don't know which, and it goes around the outside of your hip and down the front of your thigh, and maybe onward for all i know. apparently mine are a little tighter than is good; they've bothered me before. i've never had one straight up shriek at me before though. basically, as long as i don't lean forward at all and don't put any weight on my right leg, i'm ok. just the throbbing ache along its length. no prob!
so who wants to come over here and massage my right buttcheek?
note: anyone with serious bodily issues that are actually worth complaining about, ignore this post.