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January 18th, 2006


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09:03 pm - bleeding for fun and profit
i was informed today that i have small veins, and this is why it was taking so incredibly long for my poor arm to pump out plasma. news to me! i've given blood a mabillion times, and platelets once. never had much of any problem with it. and this despite their amazingly fancy setup. i think just one of their magical devices could fund every red cross blood drive i have been to. and omigod were they intense about avoiding liability. i had to affirm not having gay sex with african hooker cows on opiates vacationing in britain (or something like that) at least four times, including once where i had to read the statement out loud to the doctorlady, agree with it, and initial the paper. and then they gave me a quiz, to make sure i understood all the HIV risk factors and could give informed assurance that i was clean. (hint: all the answers were yes. it was not a difficult quiz.)
but anyway, i got to spend a couple hours reading my book (peter straub - ghost story), got 15$ for my troubles, and when i go back in a couple days and do it again, i will get 30$ more. huzzah!
state: "When life hands you AIDS, make lemon-AIDS" from biggie's away msg
np: Trans-Siberian Orchestra - Christmas Eve and Other Stories - 8 - Christmas Eve (Sarajevo 12/24)

(5 shots upside the head | en garde!)

Comments:


From:saiwa
Date:January 19th, 2006 03:55 pm (UTC)
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We had the option of donating when I went to USM....except that all the people standing outside the door had wonderful marks on their arm that we doubted were from a severe donating addiction.
We ran, far far far away....and got crappy jobs instead.
The End.


BTW, you're missing out on those cows. Amazing.
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From:mathfu
Date:January 20th, 2006 01:46 am (UTC)
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My time and plasma are worth more to me than than $45.

Oh man. That sounds so gross. But plasma is always helpful in cheering people up!
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From:kingnixon
Date:January 20th, 2006 02:23 am (UTC)
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it's not as if i do anything more useful with my time otherwise. i got paid to read! i like to read! i read for free!

and i like to know i am bringing some blood-drenched joy into people's lives and hearts and stainable fabrics
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From:johnbot
Date:February 9th, 2006 08:24 pm (UTC)
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Be careful with the quizes, sometimes they change things up a bit to catch you off guard and stick in a "You don't like to not have non-straight sex, right?"

And when I last gave blood, I admitted to plenty of african hooker cow sex without any problems.

Really though, those are some creepy questions... "are you SURE you haven't had cock up your ass recently?" And then I get a huge erection and it makes it awkward and difficult to find any remaining blood to give.
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From:johnbot
Date:February 9th, 2006 08:24 pm (UTC)
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PS I hate the trailing dollar sign thing. I know your reasons, but it's still gay.

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